Saturday, 6 September 2008

Actually both "The Untouchables" and "Tin Cup" were fine films.

You know, I don't scare all that easily. I think over the years I've been desensitized by too many reports of monsters living in dark jungles, aliens abducting farmyard animals, and of course otters, seals, Scottish Plesiosaurs frightening the bejesus out of local fishermen. In fact the last time I remember being genuinely terrified was when I found out that Kevin Costner was still making movies. I swear I've sat through autopsies that were more entertaining than 3000 miles to Graceland. That was until last night. When, for the first time in a long time, something genuinely freaked me out.

It was a moth.

Yep. A moth. A regular clothes eating, flame loving, hit it with a newspaper and it turns in to this weird dust like substance, moth. Not even a big one either. If I was to hazard a guess I reckon it was probably about an inch to an inch and a half in length. Now before you start crowing to yourself about how ludicrous it is that a grown man with his own facial hair should get frightened by an insect smaller than Jiminy Cricket allow me to set the scene.

I was in my kitchen at about half one in the morning, fixing my last glass of wine for the night while debating the need for another big sandwich (Gee Note: I say “debating the need for”, a more accurate description would be “planning”). Anyway I heard a light “thump” against window and looked up to see a moth desperately trying to do a Silver Surfer style melt through the glass. In an effort, one can only presume, to do what makes all moth's giddy with joy and fly around a light bulb for a bit. And it disturbed me. Not because of the manic scrambling of it's feet against the glass, or because it's head was bouncing off the window at regular intervals, but because of it's eyes. It's eyes were glowing red.

Just like the Mothman.

And the Mothman always scared the hell out of me when I was a kid.

You see when I started my obsession with all things odd, I was too innocent to be afraid of anything. I was convinced that Bigfoot and Yeti were just cuddly bears, that Nessie was an overgrown water horse, and that even the Indian Monkey Man was just a precocious little scamp.

But the Mothman was different. The idea of a seven foot creature with huge wings, no head, glowing red eyes, and the ability to both hang on to the side of an iron bridge and travel at 100 miles per hour? Yeah that kept me awake for a couple of evenings let me tell you.

And so I've decided to start a little mini project. For the next couple of days we at “I saw Elvis” are going to have a little Mothman-a-thon. History, theories, pictures, made up drinking games, the works.

You see, you always fear what you don't understand. My hope is that by shedding light on some of the mystery surrounding this phenomenon that I might be able to convince my inner child that there's nothing to be worried about after all.

Now if only I could say the same about Kevin Costner.

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